The chronicles of a single who doesn't want to mingle
- Alaa Abdalla
- Jul 22, 2020
- 2 min read
My sister is the reason for the crime that is about to happen. She was like you should document all those incidents that happen with you in dates. I think she got tired of me talking about how all of my dates fail, and how I don’t like any of those I go out with. I decided to use this platform and just rant about my disappointment in men. I am going to use my qualitative research skills and come up with pseudonyms for my dates. If by a miracle you identify yourself as one of those men below, I hope you are not offended. If you haven't made me feel really bad I wouldn't have wrote about it.
Me: I really like you, and I am interested in having a serious commitment with you
Mohammed: "I like you too, but I can't marry you, you are Egyptian"
Me: in my head, Wow! And I thought Americans are racist
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Arjun: “Thank you, that was very educational”
Me: In my head, wow! What a way to end a date
Arjun: “I can’t believe you are Egyptian”
Me: And I thought his comments can’t get any worse
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Me: What was the longest flight that you have ever been on?
Mark: “I have never been on a plane”
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Chris: I like travelling, I have been to many places, NY, Chicago,..etc
Me: What other countries have you visited?
Chris: “I have never been outside of the United States”
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Vijay: Let’s go to the cinema
Me: Sure, I work at the theatre btw, so you can just come after my shift ends and we will watch a movie together
Vijay: “Can you get me a ticket?”
Me: No, only the volunteers get a ticket
Vijay: “I hope it is not expensive”
Dudeee, how expensive a cinema ticket can be? Plus, you are not even paying for us both, plus you are the one who said let’s go to the cinema.
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Terrell: before our first date “I just want to chill, maybe kiss and cuddle”
Me: block
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Wednesday
Me: I am looking for a husband, I actually do want to get married
Omar: "Whaaat? No way, I thought you are a feminist. You really shocked me here"
Me: I am a feminist. That doesn't mean I hate men, I just hate misogyny. Feminists do get married!
The following Saturday
Omar: I think we should stay friends, just friends
I never saw Omar again after that day. I think Omar is scared of commitment, or he doesn't know what he wants, or he was hoping to just 'have fun' with me
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